Life wisdom and rules

Rules-900x400

Here are some rules, in basis from the Notebooks of Lazarus Long, a grand and historic figure from the mind of the Father of Science Fiction, Robert A. Heinlein. I’ve modified some over time, as society and language tend to change through the meandering course of history and evolution. Take from here what you will, I will however state that these are all moral, and independent of any religious view. They’re always a good starting point from where to regroup in most situations. These rules will change from time to time

If you are part of a society that votes, then do so. There may be no candidates and no measures you want to vote for … but there are certain to be ones you want to vote against. In case of doubt, vote against. By this rule, you will rarely go wrong. If this is too blind for your taste, consult some well meaning fool (there is always one around) and ask his advice. Then vote the other way. This enables you to be a good citizen (if such is your wish) without spending the enormous amount of time on it that truly intelligent exercise of franchise requires.
To stay young requires unceasing cultivation of the ability to unlearn old falsehoods.
Money is truthful. If a person speaks of their honour, make them pay cash.
Only a sadistic scoundrel – or a fool – tells the bald truth on social occasions.
The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning, while those other subjects merely require scholarship.
Touch is the most fundamental sense. A baby experiences it, all over, before he is born and long after he learns to use sight, hearing, or taste, and no human ever ceases to need it. Keep your children short on pocket money – but long on hugs.
Secrecy is the beginning of tyranny.
The greatest productive force is human selfishness.
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors – and miss.
Yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again.
‘Go to hell!’ or other insult direct is all the answer a snoopy question rates.
The correct way to punctuate a sentence that starts: ‘Of course it is none of my business but-‘ is to place a period after the word ‘but.’ Don’t use excessive force in supplying such a moron with a period. Cutting his throat is only a momentary pleasure and is bound to get you talked about.
A person does not insist on physical beauty in another who builds up their morale. After a while they realize that the other is beautiful – they just hadn’t noticed it at first. Beauty is not always in the eye of the beholder, and is always not skin deep.
Natural laws have no pity.
Being generous is inborn; being altruistic is a learned perversity. No resemblance!
It is impossible for a man to love his wife wholeheartedly without loving all women somewhat. The converse is true of women.
You can go wrong by being too sceptical as readily as by being to trusting.
Formal courtesy between husband and wife is even more important than it is between strangers.
Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.
Pessimist by policy, optimist by temperament – it is possible to be both. How? By never taking an unnecessary chance and by minimizing risks you can’t avoid. This permits you to play out the game happily, untroubled by the certainty of the outcome.
Do not confuse ‘duty’ with what other people expect of you; they are utterly different. Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfil obligations you have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anything from years of patient work to instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self-respect.
But there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible. It is easier to deal with a footpad than it is with the leech who wants ‘just a few minutes of your time, please – this won’t take long.’ Time is your total capital, and the minutes of your life are painfully few. If you allow yourself to fall into the vice of agreeing to such requests, they quickly snowball to the point where these parasites will use up 100 percent of your time – and squawk for more!
So learn to say No – and to be rude about it when necessary. Otherwise you will not have time to carry out your duty, or to do your own work, and certainly no time for love and happiness. The termites will nibble away your life and leave none of it for you. (This rule does not mean that you must not do a favour for a friend, or even a stranger. But let the choice be yours. Don’t do it because it is ‘expected’ of you.)
“I came, I saw, she conquered.” (The original Latin seems to have been garbled.)
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain.
Don’t try to have the last word. You might get it.
Men are more sentimental than women. It blurs their thinking.
Certainly the game is rigged. Don’t let that stop you; if you don’t bet, you can’t win.
Any priest or shaman must be presumed guilty until proven innocent.
Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect.
People who don’t drink alcohol simply can’t be trusted. Never trust another who won’t drink with you.
Never trust anyone who doesn’t swear, they’re unlikely to be honest, and will backstab you sans thought; also they’re probably a fucking ponce.
There is no conclusive evidence of life after death. But there is no evidence of any sort against it. Soon enough you will know. So why fret about it?
If a near-death experience fills you with only gloom, it’s a sign you’ve been living life the wrong way. These moments are reminders to strive to be a better person—don’t overlook them. But if you face them feeling at peace, saddened to leave but content knowing you’ve given and received love, then if life offers you another chance, embrace it!
If it can’t be expressed in figures, it is not science; it is opinion.
A ‘pacifist male’ is a contradiction in terms. Most self-described ‘pacifists’ are not pacific; they simply assume false colours. When the wind changes, they hoist the Jolly Roger.
A generation which ignores history has no past – and no future.
A poet who reads his verse in public may have other nasty habits.
What a wonderful world it is that has girls in it!
Small change can often be found under seat cushions.
History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.
It’s amazing how much ‘mature wisdom’ resembles being too tired.
If you don’t like yourself, you can’t like other people.
Your enemy is never a villain in his own eyes. Keep this in mind; it may offer a way to make him your friend. If not, you can kill him without hate – and quickly.
A motion to adjourn is always in order.
No state has an inherent right to survive through conscript troops and, in the long run, no state ever has. Roman matrons used to say to their sons: ‘Come back with your shield, or on it.’ Later on, this custom declined. So did Rome.
Of all the strange ‘crimes’ that human beings have legislated out of nothing, ‘blasphemy’ is the most amazing – with ‘obscenity’ and ‘indecent exposure’ fighting it out for second and third place.
It is better to copulate than never.
All societies are based on rules to protect pregnant women and young children. All else is surplusage, excrescence, adornment, luxury, or folly which can – and must – be dumped in emergency to preserve this prime function. As racial survival is the only universal morality, no other basic is possible. Attempts to formulate a ‘perfect society’ on any foundation other than ‘Women and children first!’ is not only witless, it is automatically genocidal. Nevertheless, starry-eyed idealists (all of them male) have tried endlessly – and no doubt will keep on trying.
All humans are created unequal.
Money is a powerful aphrodisiac. But flowers work almost as well.
A brute kills for pleasure. A fool kills from hate.
There is only one way to console a widow. But remember the risk.
When the need arises – and it does – you must be able to shoot your own dog. Don’t farm it out – that doesn’t make it nicer, it makes it worse.
Don’t hurt your children by brainwashing them into anything other than thinking for themselves.
Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavour of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.
It may be better to be a live jackal than a dead lion, but it is better still to be a live lion. And usually easier.
One person’s theology is another person’s belly laugh.
Sex should be friendly. Otherwise stick to mechanical toys; it’s more sanitary.
Never appeal to a person’s ‘better nature.’ They may not have one. Invoking his self-interest gives you more leverage.
You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don’t ever count on having both at once.
Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry. N.B.: Circumstances can force your hand, so think ahead!
Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.
In a mature society, ‘civil servant’ is semantically equal to ‘civil master.’
Democracy is based on the assumption that a million people are wiser than one person. How’s that again? I missed something.
Autocracy is based on the assumption that one person is wiser than a million people. Let’s play that over again, too. Who decides?
Any government will work if authority and responsibility are equal and coordinate. This does not insure ‘good’ government; it simply insures that it will work. But such governments are rare – most people want to run things but want no part of the blame. This used to be called the ‘backseat-driver syndrome.’
What are the facts? Again and again and again – what are the facts? Shun wishful thinking, ignore divine revelation, forget what ‘the stars foretell,’ avoid opinion, care not what the neighbours think, never mind the unguessable ‘verdict of history’ – what are the facts, and to how many decimal places? You pilot always into an unknown future; facts are your single clue. Get the facts!
Anyone who is offended merely by words not the context / intent of the words is truly stupid.
Stupidity cannot be cured with money, or through education, or by legislation. Stupidity is not a sin, the victim can’t help being stupid. But stupidity is the only universal capital crime; the sentence is death, there is no appeal, and execution is carried out automatically and without pity.
Courage is the complement of fear. A person who is fearless cannot be courageous. They’re also a fool.
The two highest achievements of the human mind are the twin concepts of ‘loyalty’ and ‘duty.’ Whenever these twin concepts fall into disrepute – get out of there fast! You may possibly save yourself, but it is too late to save that society. It is doomed.
No society can claim civilization until it has cats. A society can be easily judged on how it treats cats and other companions.
People who go broke in a big way never miss any meals. It is the poor jerk who is shy a half slug who must tighten his belt.
The truth of a proposition has nothing to do with its credibility. And vice versa.
Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best they’re a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house.
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, con a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyse a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, swear like a sailor, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
The more you love, the more you can love – and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority that are decent and just.
Masturbation is cheap, clean, convenient, and free of any possibility of wrongdoing – and you don’t have to go home in the cold. But it’s lonely.
Women and cats will do as they please, men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea!
Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil. If tempted by something that feels ‘altruistic,’ examine your motives and root out that self-deception. Then, if you still want to do it, wallow in it.
The most preposterous notion that H. sapiens has ever dreamed up is that the Lord God of Creation, Shaper and Ruler of all the Universes, wants the saccharine adoration of His creatures, can be swayed by their prayers, and becomes petulant if He does not receive this flattery. Yet this absurd fantasy, without a shred of evidence to bolster it, pays all the expenses of the oldest, largest, and least productive industry in all history.
The second most preposterous notion is that copulation is inherently sinful.
Dear, don’t bore your love with trivia or burden them with your past mistakes. The happiest way to deal with another is never to tell them anything they do not need to know; of course this doesn’t mean some chat from time to time, but awareness will save all.
Everyone takes off their dignity with clothes and does their outright whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Remember, Humans are at base, animals.
Everybody lies about sex.
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
Money is the sincerest of all flattery. Women love to be flattered. So do men.
You live and learn. Or you don’t live long.
Whenever women have insisted on absolute equality with men, they have invariably wound up with the dirty end of the stick. What they are and what they can do makes them superior to men, and their proper tactic is to demand special privileges, all the traffic will bear. They should never settle merely for equality. For women, ‘equality’ is a disaster.
Peace is an extension of war by political means. Plenty of elbow room is pleasanter – and much safer.
One person’s ‘magic’ is another person’s engineering. ‘Supernatural’ is a null word.
The phrase ‘we (I) (you) simply must-‘ designates something that need not be done. ‘That goes without saying’ is a red warning. ‘Of course’ means that you had best check it yourself. These small-change cliches and others like them, when read correctly, are reliable channel markers.
Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy.
Rub her feet.
If you happen to be one of the fretful minority who can do creative work, never force an idea; you’ll abort it if you do. Be patient and you’ll give birth to it when the time is ripe. Learn to wait.
Never crowd youngsters about their private affairs – sex especially. When they are growing up, they are nerve ends all over, and resent (quite properly) any invasion of their privacy. Oh sure, they’ll make mistakes – but that’s their business, not yours. (You made your own mistakes, did you not?)
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
If you’re young now, carefully examine the old. One day, assuming you live that long, you’ll become old. Youngsters, take the long-view in mind with your thoughts towards the future, and how you interact and judge the old, and potentially wise ones. You will invariably become the mirror and objects of your potential distaste.
Wisdom cannot be bought, cannot be taught, the only way to truly acquire wisdom is to live out the time and events. Wisdom can be recorded, but the clavate to that is it must also be read by the young, whom invariably don’t. Wisdom often requires the long-view. This is the Human condition – bright enough to know what’s happening, too fucking stupid half the time!
A human should be able to eat without spitting their food everywhere, those individuals who cannot master this simple act of chewing with their mouth closed should be ignored at best, shot on site where possible.
Assumption is death to the unwary, anticipation is life to the wise.
Progress is made by two groups in society: 1) Early Risers, get up before owt else and do stuff. 2) Lazy people trying to find easier methods to do anything and everything… KISS.
Charity is the first step on the road to communism and often directly goes against its own goals.
Half the battle in life is think about what you do, why you do it, and then the other half is having the balls and abilities to change that behaviour for the better. Stand out from the crowd and question why.
Occam’s razor – this can be summed up by the following statement “Keep It Simple, Stupid…”, this is more often than not entirely accurate and will speed you through those difficult decisions.
Offended? Good. Makes you feel alive. Everyone has the right to be offended, cause offence and be told to fuck off, quite equally. Anyone who thinks otherwise is clearly insane.

#Deep Thought #Random #Spabbit #ThereIsNoSpoon